LET’S CATCH UP 9.1.23

Welcome to the ‘ber months! Labor Day weekend always feels so bittersweet to me. While I’m sad to see summer go, the fall and holidays are a time of year that I really love. Plus (and this feels truly wild to say) – I’m getting married this month and then we’ll be headed out on our honeymoon. Needless to say, a lot to look forward to! We’re spending the long weekend at the lake house with my family which has become a lovely little yearly tradition. Hope you all have fun plans! Before we head out – here’s what’s on my mind, on my bookshelf and in my cart.

ON MY MIND:

  • It’s ironic that – despite never dreaming of a big wedding – half of my favorite movies center around the big day. Just for fun, in the weeks leading up to our own, Adam and I have been watching 1 classic wedding movie a week. So far we’ve done The Wedding Singer and Four Weddings & A Funeral – still in the docket: My Best Friend’s Wedding, Father of the Bride, and Runaway Bride. What are we missing?
  • What else have you been watching? We’re in season 2 of The Bear (obsessed) and I just finished season 2 of The Summer I Turned Pretty. I read the books so I knew this season was going to be a heartbreaker, but still.. oof. #TeamConrad forever though. I want to start on season 3 of Only Murders in the Building too.
  • I don’t think I’ve ever shared a recipe here before (a skilled chef I am not) but in an effort to save money on takeout and eat healthy I’ve been making ‘kung pao shrimp‘ at home this summer and it’s SO good. And easy. My only two requirements.

IN MY CART:

  • I’m almost shocked at how much reading I managed this summer, despite an absolutely bonkers few months. I think it totaled 12 books! I’m going to post a recap of them all later this weekend.
  • My book club is meeting in a couple of weeks to chat about The Bandit Queens by Parini Shroff – I need to dive in asap if I’m going to finish in time!
  • You know when you’re just going to love a book before you’ve even started it? Tom Lake by Ann Patchett is getting great reviews and since I’ve pretty much loved everything she’s ever written.. it feels like a sure thing.

IN MY CART:

  • Now that I’ve got my wedding day attire *nearly* squared away.. I’ve turned all attention to planning my honeymoon outfits. Why didn’t anyone mention how fun this part would be?!? I’m not going to give too much away about our plans but I can tell you.. there will definitely be occasion for fun accessories. I just got this black beaded evening bag, these high shine silver mary jane heels and have my eye on this rosette choker – which I’m thinking might double well as a belt over a dress.
  • Speaking of accessories – you all KNOW I’m a fall shoe devotee. And this season there are so many ‘trends’ that feel timeless to me and are right up my more classic style alley. I’m excited to jump on board with: kitten heels, bright cherry red or dark wine red (code: THESTEELEMAIDEN15 gets you 15% off this pair), loafers, mary janes, ballet flats, chocolate brown.. I promise to exert some modicum of restraint.
  • I need a bit of a denim refresh this season and I love this simple wide, but not too wide, pair and this pencil skirt (note: I first ordered my usual size in this skirt and it was very large – I’m sizing down 2 sizes in this and then I think it will be perfect. It has quite a bit of stretch).
  • Completely frivolous but I got this pumpkin mug last year and it brings me SO much joy. It sold out quickly but I just saw they’re back in stock in cute new colors this year. I suggest you make a run for it.
  • Talbots – is that you? How cool is this leather blazer. If you’re not feeling that 90s though – this colorful tweed option is the type of thing I always go with from the brand. Throw on over a mini dress or with a pair of jeans and a cardigan and you’re good to go.
  • The Reformation Sale is still going on – but sizes are going fast. I love this midi dress. And not on sale – but how pretty is this polka dot top for a date night?
  • Aside from our own, we also have a 2 other weddings to attend this fall. I tried this dress on a whim (under $120) and ended up loving it – the color and fit are gorgeous in person. I’m packing it for our honeymoon and planning to re-wear it to one of the other weddings.
  • I’m pretty sure I’ve begged this of you all in years past, but truly.. bury me in a mini skirt, sweater, and loafers.

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SUMMER TO FALL: TRANSITIONAL STYLE

Fashion wise, I really love the window between late August and early October. That magic time of year where weather allows summer pieces to still be worn, fall pieces to be introduced and layers to be mixed and matched is just bliss. Bury me in a sweater, mini skirt, bare legs and socks/loafers, will you? Below, 13 items that I’ve got lingering in online carts as we speak.

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ON LIFE: THE “M” WORD

If I had a dollar for every time someone has asked me when Adam and I were going to get married… well I don’t know if I’d be a rich woman but I certainly could have bought myself a very nice pair of shoes by now. If I had a dollar for every time someone asked him the same question, or instead questioned me on when I’d become a boss or earn 6 figures or travel the world.. I’d be barefoot out there. As Taylor Swift says.. “All they keep asking me, is if I’m gonna be your bride? The only kind of girl they see is a one night or a wife.” (bless her). For a reason I can’t comprehend, it seems to trouble people when they can’t chart a woman’s path. I suppose it seems dangerous if we’re allowed to veer too far off course?

For the record, I’ve never said I wouldn’t get married. I just have never felt any pressure to do it according to someone else’s timeline. I have been committed to Adam since pretty much the moment I laid eyes on him. We’ve spent the past (nearly 13) years growing together, learning how best to love each other.. trying for other sorts of dreams. None of that is any less worthy of celebration just because we weren’t married.

I suppose I’m saying all of this because I have somewhat complicated feelings about some of the notions of marriage. But I very much like the idea of a partnership and sharing your life with someone you love. And I’m not against putting that on a legal document. I’m just against acting like getting asked to do so is the crowning achievement of a woman’s life.

What I’m getting at is this. Adam and I are getting married in September. We’re doing it our way, just like we’ve done it for the past decade+ and how I hope we continue for the next 5 or 6 decades to come. I can’t imagine sharing the “engagement” story here (some things are too precious and personal for the internet, no?), there’s no ring, and I’ve never had any intentions of having a bridal shower or a bachelorette party. All of those things are great if you want them.. I just don’t.

There will just be two people, on what I hope is a crisp Fall day in New York City, putting a bookmark in a story that’s still being written.

Thank you all for being here for quite a bit of that story and for all of the kind words that have been sent our way since I mentioned this on Instagram. It’s so touching to know that people have been rooting for us all along (marriage or not). And I do promise to share a few bits and pieces of this all with you as it happens.

SUMMER OUTFITS LATELY


I’m in firm denial that summer is halfway over (this every day is a thunderstorm weather is reallyyy putting a damper on things) – but I have managed to put a few outfits together lately that I’ve liked so I figured I’d share a few here. A mix of date nights and work days mostly.

(Above):


Theory Jacket (old), JCrew T-Shirt and Slip Skirt, Straw Bag bought in Paris, Loeffler Randall Sandals

Alexis Bittar Earrings, Abercrombie Shirt (old), Neely & Chloe Bag (old), Abercrombie Pants, Coach Sneakers (old)

Few Moda Dress (gifted), Marc Fisher Sandals (old)

J.Crew Shirt (old), Boden Shorts, Inez Sandals (gifted, use code: thesteelemaiden15 for 15% off your order!)

Banana Republic Vest and Shorts, Alexis Bittar Bangle, J.Crew Sandals and Bag (old)

Few Moda Dress (gifted), Talbots Sandals (old)

LET’S CATCH UP 7.2.23

We’re officially halfway through the year – a somewhat surreal feeling, no? Regardless I’m using this (iffy weather) weekend to reflect back on the first half and set a few intentions as we head into the second half. Also – if you happened to notice, my entire blog crashed earlier this week and I lost the old template design. Apparently everything is getting a fresh start as we head into July? I don’t hate it. Regardless, I hope to be posting here a bit more. I’m suddenly in a blog-ish mood after a long time of not feeling that way.

Below, what else is on my mind, on my bookshelf and in my cart as we make our way through this holiday weekend (special shout-out to anyone else, like me, that is working in office on Monday…):

ON MY MIND:

  • I had the pleasure of seeing an early screening of Wes Anderson’s new Asteroid City a couple of weeks ago (thanks Focus Films) – if you’re looking for a way to escape the smoke or storms this weekend, I’d recommend it! As usual with Anderson, it’s a feast for the eyes but I also particularly liked this ensemble cast. The kids were brilliant! Tom Hanks! Maya Hawke! Fun.
  • On Saturday night I scored us hard to get seats at Tokyo Record Bar – a tiny speakeasy of a restaurant hidden in the basement below Air’s Champagne Parlor. Over an hour and a half, you’re served 7 courses while a DJ spins tracks selected by the guests from a ‘music menu’ of the records that line the walls. It’s hard to describe but as vinyl/music loving people – we had the best time. Afterwards, we popped upstairs and toasted with champagne. Ahh.. New York.
  • I’m headed to Kansas City next weekend for a long overdue weekend with my 2 closest college friends. And we justtt so happen to have tickets to see Taylor on Friday night – I’m hoping she’s got some tricks up her bejeweled sleeves since it corresponds with the release of Speak Now (Taylor’s Version). I’ll be wearing this Lavender Haze meets Lover inspired dress.

ON MY BOOKSHELF:

  • I’m steadily making my way through my 2023 Summer Reading List and am currently about 3/4 of the way through ‘The Lincoln Highway‘ – I’m admittedly not loving it as much as Amor Towles’ ‘Rules of Civility’ but I’m solidly enjoying it and the 600ish pages are flying by much faster than I worried they would.
  • After reading and absolutely loving her memoir ‘Wild Game’ a few years ago, I pre-ordered Adrienne Brodeur’s new fiction ‘Little Monsters‘ for myself and my bookish BFF Claire. I plan on reading this as my in-flight book next weekend.
  • My virtual book club (now 3 years in!) decided to do a fun backlist title for July and we’re reading Valley of the Dolls – it’s a re-read for most of us but I haven’t read this in at least a decade and remember loving it in my early 20s. Can’t wait to dive in again.

IN MY CART:

  • I recently tried Alex Mill for the first time (from Mickey Dexler, the man who led Gap in the 90s and J.Crew in the early 00s – so he knows what he’s doing) – the brand focuses on elevated basics and I loved this skirt that I ordered. So much so, that when I saw they were doing a rare 4th of July sale I picked it up in this print along with the matching button down shirt.
  • I am fresh out of candles and it’s driving me crazy – I’m going to pick up a few on sale at Anthropologie (I love the tortoise shell looking glass on this one) plus finally try Hotel Lobby (which everyone raves about) in Paris Nuit since they’re having a 20% Off sale.
  • I’ve been trying to be more diligent about my skincare lately and so when my friends at Elemis offered to send over a few products to try I happily jumped on board. I’m about 2 months into using them and while the brand is spendy, I truly see and feel a difference in my skin when I’m consistent in using them. My current favorites are these resurfacing facial pads and the silkiest pro-collagen moisturizer – 25% off right now in their sitewide sale, so a great chance to try them!
  • J.Crew has been killing it these last couple of season (largely, in my opinion, thanks to their fairly new Womenswear Director, Olympia Gayot) – how cute is this little bag and this vintage looking dress?
  • I took a chance on these (final sale) red strappy sandals a couple of weeks ago and.. no regrets. Super comfortable out of the box and they make even a simple jeans and tee type outfit look chic. I found them true to size.

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