Author: thesteelemaiden

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SUMMER TO FALL: TRANSITIONAL STYLE

Fashion wise, I really love the window between late August and early October. That magic time of year where weather allows summer pieces to still be worn, fall pieces to be introduced and layers to be mixed and matched is just bliss. Bury me in a sweater, mini skirt, bare legs and socks/loafers, will you? Below, 13 items that I’ve got lingering in online carts as we speak.

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ON LIFE: THE “M” WORD

If I had a dollar for every time someone has asked me when Adam and I were going to get married… well I don’t know if I’d be a rich woman but I certainly could have bought myself a very nice pair of shoes by now. If I had a dollar for every time someone asked him the same question, or instead questioned me on when I’d become a boss or earn 6 figures or travel the world.. I’d be barefoot out there. As Taylor Swift says.. “All they keep asking me, is if I’m gonna be your bride? The only kind of girl they see is a one night or a wife.” (bless her). For a reason I can’t comprehend, it seems to trouble people when they can’t chart a woman’s path. I suppose it seems dangerous if we’re allowed to veer too far off course?

For the record, I’ve never said I wouldn’t get married. I just have never felt any pressure to do it according to someone else’s timeline. I have been committed to Adam since pretty much the moment I laid eyes on him. We’ve spent the past (nearly 13) years growing together, learning how best to love each other.. trying for other sorts of dreams. None of that is any less worthy of celebration just because we weren’t married.

I suppose I’m saying all of this because I have somewhat complicated feelings about some of the notions of marriage. But I very much like the idea of a partnership and sharing your life with someone you love. And I’m not against putting that on a legal document. I’m just against acting like getting asked to do so is the crowning achievement of a woman’s life.

What I’m getting at is this. Adam and I are getting married in September. We’re doing it our way, just like we’ve done it for the past decade+ and how I hope we continue for the next 5 or 6 decades to come. I can’t imagine sharing the “engagement” story here (some things are too precious and personal for the internet, no?), there’s no ring, and I’ve never had any intentions of having a bridal shower or a bachelorette party. All of those things are great if you want them.. I just don’t.

There will just be two people, on what I hope is a crisp Fall day in New York City, putting a bookmark in a story that’s still being written.

Thank you all for being here for quite a bit of that story and for all of the kind words that have been sent our way since I mentioned this on Instagram. It’s so touching to know that people have been rooting for us all along (marriage or not). And I do promise to share a few bits and pieces of this all with you as it happens.

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SUMMER OUTFITS LATELY


I’m in firm denial that summer is halfway over (this every day is a thunderstorm weather is reallyyy putting a damper on things) – but I have managed to put a few outfits together lately that I’ve liked so I figured I’d share a few here. A mix of date nights and work days mostly.

(Above):


Theory Jacket (old), JCrew T-Shirt and Slip Skirt, Straw Bag bought in Paris, Loeffler Randall Sandals

Alexis Bittar Earrings, Abercrombie Shirt (old), Neely & Chloe Bag (old), Abercrombie Pants, Coach Sneakers (old)

Few Moda Dress (gifted), Marc Fisher Sandals (old)

J.Crew Shirt (old), Boden Shorts, Inez Sandals (gifted, use code: thesteelemaiden15 for 15% off your order!)

Banana Republic Vest and Shorts, Alexis Bittar Bangle, J.Crew Sandals and Bag (old)

Few Moda Dress (gifted), Talbots Sandals (old)

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LET’S CATCH UP 7.2.23

We’re officially halfway through the year – a somewhat surreal feeling, no? Regardless I’m using this (iffy weather) weekend to reflect back on the first half and set a few intentions as we head into the second half. Also – if you happened to notice, my entire blog crashed earlier this week and I lost the old template design. Apparently everything is getting a fresh start as we head into July? I don’t hate it. Regardless, I hope to be posting here a bit more. I’m suddenly in a blog-ish mood after a long time of not feeling that way.

Below, what else is on my mind, on my bookshelf and in my cart as we make our way through this holiday weekend (special shout-out to anyone else, like me, that is working in office on Monday…):

ON MY MIND:

  • I had the pleasure of seeing an early screening of Wes Anderson’s new Asteroid City a couple of weeks ago (thanks Focus Films) – if you’re looking for a way to escape the smoke or storms this weekend, I’d recommend it! As usual with Anderson, it’s a feast for the eyes but I also particularly liked this ensemble cast. The kids were brilliant! Tom Hanks! Maya Hawke! Fun.
  • On Saturday night I scored us hard to get seats at Tokyo Record Bar – a tiny speakeasy of a restaurant hidden in the basement below Air’s Champagne Parlor. Over an hour and a half, you’re served 7 courses while a DJ spins tracks selected by the guests from a ‘music menu’ of the records that line the walls. It’s hard to describe but as vinyl/music loving people – we had the best time. Afterwards, we popped upstairs and toasted with champagne. Ahh.. New York.
  • I’m headed to Kansas City next weekend for a long overdue weekend with my 2 closest college friends. And we justtt so happen to have tickets to see Taylor on Friday night – I’m hoping she’s got some tricks up her bejeweled sleeves since it corresponds with the release of Speak Now (Taylor’s Version). I’ll be wearing this Lavender Haze meets Lover inspired dress.

ON MY BOOKSHELF:

  • I’m steadily making my way through my 2023 Summer Reading List and am currently about 3/4 of the way through ‘The Lincoln Highway‘ – I’m admittedly not loving it as much as Amor Towles’ ‘Rules of Civility’ but I’m solidly enjoying it and the 600ish pages are flying by much faster than I worried they would.
  • After reading and absolutely loving her memoir ‘Wild Game’ a few years ago, I pre-ordered Adrienne Brodeur’s new fiction ‘Little Monsters‘ for myself and my bookish BFF Claire. I plan on reading this as my in-flight book next weekend.
  • My virtual book club (now 3 years in!) decided to do a fun backlist title for July and we’re reading Valley of the Dolls – it’s a re-read for most of us but I haven’t read this in at least a decade and remember loving it in my early 20s. Can’t wait to dive in again.

IN MY CART:

  • I recently tried Alex Mill for the first time (from Mickey Dexler, the man who led Gap in the 90s and J.Crew in the early 00s – so he knows what he’s doing) – the brand focuses on elevated basics and I loved this skirt that I ordered. So much so, that when I saw they were doing a rare 4th of July sale I picked it up in this print along with the matching button down shirt.
  • I am fresh out of candles and it’s driving me crazy – I’m going to pick up a few on sale at Anthropologie (I love the tortoise shell looking glass on this one) plus finally try Hotel Lobby (which everyone raves about) in Paris Nuit since they’re having a 20% Off sale.
  • I’ve been trying to be more diligent about my skincare lately and so when my friends at Elemis offered to send over a few products to try I happily jumped on board. I’m about 2 months into using them and while the brand is spendy, I truly see and feel a difference in my skin when I’m consistent in using them. My current favorites are these resurfacing facial pads and the silkiest pro-collagen moisturizer – 25% off right now in their sitewide sale, so a great chance to try them!
  • J.Crew has been killing it these last couple of season (largely, in my opinion, thanks to their fairly new Womenswear Director, Olympia Gayot) – how cute is this little bag and this vintage looking dress?
  • I took a chance on these (final sale) red strappy sandals a couple of weeks ago and.. no regrets. Super comfortable out of the box and they make even a simple jeans and tee type outfit look chic. I found them true to size.

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MY 2023 SUMMER READING LIST

Summer reading is always, to me at least, the best kind of reading. From conquering a classic to beach bag picks, some of my best reading of the year is always done in these months. Last week on Instagram I shared 10 books on my summer reading list.. and then I realized that for the past 3 years running I’ve posted my lists here (2020, 2021 and 2022) – and I’d hate to break that chain. As a thank you for those who are visiting here, I’m adding 5 more to the list. Below – 15 books I can’t wait to dive into this summer. Hope you find something to add to your TBR (to be read) stack!
  1. Happy Place by Emily Henry: First things first. Every summer needs a great rom-com and Henry consistently turns out solid content in that department. In full disclosure I already flew through this one last weekend and loved it.
  2. Tender Is The Night by F. Scott Fitzgerald: Admittedly, this was also on last summer’s list – but I’m determined to conquer it this summer.
  3. The Guest by Emma Cline: I’ve already finished this one too – I’m flying through the list! But highly recommend if you want something with a bit of tension/suspense that’s not at all a thriller. I loved Cline’s ‘The Girls’ a few years back and really liked this too.
  4. June Loves Legs by Karl Geary: A heart-wrenching coming of age story of friendship, set in 1990s Ireland. This one grabbed my eye on a recent browse at the Strand so I picked it up.
  5. American Mermaid by Julia Langbein: I love when a book feels like it has a truly original premise and this Hollywood story with a hint magical realism sounds like it will fit the bill. Also, it was praised by the authors of ‘Pizza Girl’ and ‘Circe’ – both of which I loved, so I’m really looking forward to this one.
  6. Brutes by Dizz Tate: The Virgin Suicides meets the restless humidity of Florida – I love a dark story of girlhood. I’ve had this debut novel on my list for a few months now.
  7. Vanderbilt: The Rise and Fall of an American Dynasty by Anderson Cooper: One of only 2 non-fiction books to make the list, I love Gilded Age history so I’m excited to make time for this one.
  8. Shrines of Gaiety by Kate Atkinson: Set in the dark underbelly of a glittering 1920s era London, I’ve heard great things about Atkinson as an author and this setting already has me hooked.
  9. Last Summer In The City by Gianfranco Calligarich: Billed as a ‘forgotten classic’ this book, translated from Italian, was originally published in 1974. I’m 40 pages in and it gives me the feel of Fitzgerald or Hemingway meet Andre Aciman’s ‘Call Me By Your Name’. I thought it was going to be a more challenging literary read but I’m already totally immersed in it.
  10. The Furrows by Namwali Serpell: A reflection on memory and grief, this story follows a woman who is looking back on the death of her younger brother when she was a girl. I’m reading for my virtual book club and will be interested to hear what everyone thought!
  11. At Balthazar: The New York Brasserie at the Center of the World by Reggie Nadelson: I love a food scene book, from fictional Sweet Bitter to non-fiction reflections from Anthony Bourdain and Ruth Reichl, so I’m excited to get a behind the scenes look at a New York institution in this new release.
  12. The Librarianist by Patrick DeWitt: I loved the dark humor and unnerving charm in DeWitt’s ‘French Exit’ so I’m ready and waiting to pick this up when it releases in July, following an aging librarian in Portland, Oregon as he begins to volunteer at a local retirement home.
  13. The Museum of Extraordinary Things by Alice Hoffman: My NYC book club is reading this one, set in Coney Island at the turn of the century, before we head there on a bookish field trip. I love Hoffman’s ‘Practical Magic’ series so I’m looking forward to diving into her backlist.
  14. Same Time Next Summer by Annabel Monaghan: Admittedly, since I flew through Happy Place I wanted to stack this list with at least one more fun rom-com and I’m excited for this after reading and loving Monaghan’s ‘Nora Goes Off Script’ last year.
  15. Lincoln Highway by Amor Towles: Intimidating in size at almost 600 pages, but if it’s anything like ‘Rules of Civility’ I’ll be flying through it. Towles does historical fiction so beautifully and I can’t wait to follow the story of two brothers on a 10 day cross country drive, set in 1954.

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