Author: thesteelemaiden

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MY 2024 FALL READING LIST

I know I say this every year, but there is nothing better than Fall reading in my opinion. On a park bench with crunchy leaves underfoot or a chilly evening spent under a blanket with a cup of tea will always be peak bookish-ness to me. This year I’ve got a great stack that I’ve been saving for this season specifically – and it’s a fun mix too – from a buzzy new release and cute romcom to a couple of real back list titles, some historical fiction and naturally – something a little witchy. Below – the 10 books I’m looking forward to reading this Fall. What’s on your list?

Blue Sisters by Coco Mellors: My most anticipated new release this season – I’m going in blind because after loving her debut Cleopatra and Frankenstein a couple of years ago, I trust wherever Mellors is going to take me with this one.

James by Percival Everett: A Pulitzer Prize finalist, James is a reimagined Huckleberry Finn, this time from Jim’s perspective. My book club is reading this month and I’m looking forward to reading something classic-adjacent. Plus, I’ve heard nothing but rave reviews of this.

The Witches of New York by Ami McKay: It’s not Fall reading without a little something witchy. I meant to read this last year and between our wedding and honeymoon and a million other things, didn’t get to it. Can’t wait to dive in this year.

A Year in Provence by Peter Mayle: I’ve had a used copy of this book for ages and the other day I finally picked it up. Because it follows the calendar year of Peter’s year in Provence – it would in all honesty be a good January book – but I’ve started now and am enjoying it.. so onward!

September by Rosamunde Pilcher: This summer I read The Shell Seekers and adored it. Pilcher has a timeless voice that’s captivating but accessible – and because these are like 25 years backlist, there are plenty of her titles for my to comb through. I’m going to pick this one up to match with the season, naturally.

Hester by Laurie Lico Albanese: Another retelling, this one of the woman who inspired Nathanial Hawthorne’s Scarlett Letter. I picked up my copy of this two years ago on a trip to Salem (dying to go back for a longer visit this fall) – and so it feels fitting to match it to this same time of year.

You, Again by Kate Goldbeck: The only thing I’ve heard about this romcom is that it has a ‘When Harry Met Sally’ vibe – and frankly that’s all I need to know. And, like the movie poster, the book has a fall-ish cover – so feels like a fun one to pick up now!

Empire Falls by Richard Russo: I’ve heard this backlist title from 2001 is like a literary Gilmore Girls (say less) and on top of that it won the Pulitzer that year. I’ve been saving for this season and am really looking forward to getting into this one.

The Mad Women’s Ball by Victoria Mas – One from last Fall’s TBR stack that I never go around to reading! Set in 1880s Belle Epoque Paris, with a gothic sounding twist. I’m going in fairly blind here too but its largely set in an asylum for women that society has deemed hysterical or otherwise crazy – so I think it will have a dark enough edge to feel just right for spooky season.

Hot Hex Boyfriend by Carly Bloom – It’s a fluffy, witchy romcom. I will be taking no further questions on my choice to read this book.

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LET’S CATCH UP 8.31.14

We arrived to the lake house late Thursday night for the holiday weekend and are hosting family throughout the weekend. Fall comes early here so it’s very much sweater weather already, but hoping for some last sunshine and boat rides over the next few days.

As bittersweet as summer’s end always feels, the ‘ber months are truly some of my favorite of the year and I have lots of things, both big and small, that I’m really excited for in September and October especially.

Below – what else is on my mind as we head into the long weekend. Have a good one friends!

ON MY MIND:

  • Despite having graduated 15 years ago, the Tuesday after Labor Day will always feel like a ‘back to school’ fresh start – which I love. In our neighborhood (surrounded by elementary and middle schools) there’s a palpable, buzzing energy of anticipation. What will the ‘year’ ahead bring? It makes me want to start a fresh notebook and get a new pack of my favorite pens.
  • I’ve lost track of how many times I’ve toyed with the idea of of re-instating my old blog newsletter over the years, and it’s just never happened. Do I dare throw my hat into the Substack ring instead? I’m really looking for a space where I can write more regularly and also more broadly. There would be my usual fashion/life but other topics as well – maybe fashion industry/career, some of my fiction writing.. a little bit of a grab bag? I’d love to just start and see where it goes.
  • One of my favorite, make ahead weekday lunches is this simple mediterranean inspired salad: 1/2 cup quinoa, 1/4 cup chickpeas, diced cucumbers, tomatoes, red onions, lemon juice, cinnamon, cumin, feta and then top with baby spinach each day. So simple to make a big batch ahead and then just portion out into Tupperware for the week ahead.
  • While I’m sad to see summer go – I made a pretty good dent in my summer bucket list over the past few months (6 out of 10!). I love making these as a way to really celebrate each fleeting season and also be intentional with how I spend my time and money. One of my favorite nights was last Sunday when we checked Grand Banks off the list – an oyster bar boat docked in the Hudson while you watch the sunset over downtown? A very good New York summer night.

ON MY BOOKSHELF:

  • All things considered I made pretty good progress on my Summer Reading List with 9 out of 15 read – and then a handful of books ‘off list’. Similar to my Summer Bucket List – it’s just for fun, but makes me feel like I’m curating my reading each season in a fun way.. am I the only one that loves list-making this much? I’ll recap my reviews this week.
  • Blue Sisters by Coco Mellors releases next Tuesday Sept. 3rd and it’s my most anticipated new release this fall. I loved her debut novel Cleopatra and Frankenstein, so despite being on a temporary book buying ban.. I’m making an exception for this one!
  • Equally anticipated is Claire Lombardo’s Same As It Ever Was which I plan to start over the long weekend. Her first novel The Most Fun We Ever Had was one of my favorite reads from a couple of years ago.

IN MY CART:

  • How are we feeling about western influences that are everywhere this season? I’ve been looking for cowboy-adjacent boots (that feel more Nolita than Nashville) and this affordable pair feels just right – in a nice dark chocolate suede. Also – this acorn-hued leather pair feels like it’s a nod to the Western trend without being so literal. Super chic with a flowy skirt and knitwear this fall.
  • When I tell you, this dress stopped me in my scrolling tracks online the other night. The chocolate and ivory stripes, the draping.. so, so chic!
  • Let’s talk light jacket weather. Here’s a great fall trench coat (I like the slightly darker tan color), from an unexpected source, at an equally great price. And they always have sales! Barn coats are everywhere this season and I’m tempted by this shorter, boxier take in either the dark plaid or that dusty blue. And don’t sleep on the evening jacket! Pair this brocade leopard number with jeans, slick heels and a chic little black ‘going out top’ and you’ve got date night sorted.
  • As much as I’m a summer person – we can all admit, fall fashion is far superior. I’m loving the ‘It’ colors this season (as dictated by Marie Claire). I’m particularly drawn to dark cherry red and that cornflower blue (like this satin button down) right now.
  • Last year we attended 2 fall weddings (outside of our own!) and while we don’t have any on the calendar this year – I’m always on the lookout for great event dresses. You never know when an occasion might arise, right? I love this under $150 option (burgundy with long-sleeves and a feather hem, so chic!) for a cocktail attire dress code event or this semi sheer bronze knit option.
  • Call me crazy but I can’t stop thinking about this two piece matching floral trousers and vest set. Together it’s a bold punch, but imagine the pants with just a solid crewneck cashmere sweater, or the vest with jeans and a button down underneath? The options are kind of endless and all a little bit unexpected, which I love.
  • When it comes to fall, leopard is a neutral. I love these classic slingback calf hair pumps – at a great price for the quality.

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SUMMER TO FALL TRANSITIONAL STYLE

Maybe it’s the rain and the slightly cooler temps, or maybe it’s just the lifelong itch for ‘back to school’ clothes I always get in August – whatever it is, I officially have Fall fashion on the brain. I’m trying to be extra mindful on any purchases for the new season (we have some big things we’re saving for), which is why I always find it helpful to start early on – saving items that excited me for the season ahead, and ideally ones that I could wear now and later. Below – what’s on my list.

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Aligne Pinstripe Vest | Le Specs Sunglasses | IT Cosmetics Lip Gloss | Madewell Suede Bag | Sandro Floral Dress | Dolce Vita Metallic Sneakers | Alexis Bittar Hoops | Ulla Johnson Sheer Dress | YSL Perfume | Reformation Suede Jacket | Staud Beaded Bag | Reformation Denim Midi Skirt | Frame Chocolate Jeans | French Connection Striped Top | Larroudé Gold Knotted Heels | Talbots Thin Leather Belt | J.Crew Crushed Satin Tank

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A YEAR OF HEALTH AND HABITS

Let my preface this post by saying – my weight is the least interesting thing about me. And if body talk is something that makes you feel uncomfortable, please skip this post! That being said – this blog has always been a reflection of my life, and this has been a fairly large part of my life for the past year.. so I’m sharing. Also – I hope that it might resonate with some of you who are either on a similar journey or serve as a small bit of motivation and support for anyone looking to do the same.

In early July of 2023, I admitted to myself that I had gotten to a place where I felt really uncomfortable in my own skin. My clothes were tight (even the ones I’d sized up in), I was constantly bloated, not sleeping well, I felt sluggish all the time and I had no real stamina or strength to speak of. I hadn’t stepped on a scale in years, telling myself that it wasn’t about a number (and it wasn’t/isn’t), but in doing so – I had removed all accountability. I think it was a long time coming, but I basically woke up in July of last year and felt fed up with myself and knew I wanted to make serious changes to my health and habits.

There’s a lot of talk about body positivity (or at the least neutrality) and the urge to resist diet/work-out culture. It felt almost anti-feminist to care about my weight or dress size. But here’s the thing – I can believe that women shouldn’t be judged on their bodies and want mine to be as healthy as it can. I also felt certain that this change wasn’t being motivated by the desire to look like women I saw on social media or a because my partner was pressuring me to maintain a certain weight. Rather from the desire to regain control over my habits, feel strong and, as I age, maintain a healthy lifestyle that will lead to a great quality of life for years to come.

To begin with, I stepped back on the scale. That was.. hard. I had to face the fact that I’d slowly and without thought, gained 25 pounds in the past 6 or so years.

Then – I took a really hard look at my habits. If you had asked me in early 2023 – I would have said that I exercised somewhat regularly and I ate pretty well most of the time. Except I had mindless snacks every night after dinner even when I wasn’t really hungry, “treated” myself to sugar-y things anytime I was stressed or it felt like fun, never said no to a second alcoholic beverage after a first drink, and my workout routine was the first thing to go when work/life got busy.

In the hopes of creating changes that would be sustainable for years to come, I started small. I wrote a list of starting point non-negotiables in the Notes app on my phone:

  • Take the stairs both ways on my lunch break at work (my office is on the 5th floor)
  • Avoid mindless snacking when I’m not really hungry
  • 3 strength work-outs a week, 1 cardio work-out a week
  • No alcohol at home (I felt like it was important to distinguish a cocktail when out to dinner that felt fun and social vs. a beer on the couch that I wasn’t even really enjoying)
  • Drink more water
  • 8 hours of sleep a night
  • Listen to my body!

I started with those (without compromise), and as they felt like they began to lock into place – I added more. Like the rule of inertia but for habits, it seemed that changes in a positive direction seemingly wanted to keep going that way. Or maybe it was just that, I was surprised to actually be seeing the results I’d felt were somehow out of reach and so I felt really encouraged to keep going.

  • 1 month in and my clothes started to fit a little more comfortably. The list of non-negotiables felt like less of a struggle to accomplish every day.
  • 3 months in and I’d lost nearly 15 pounds, was sleeping soundly and felt less bloated. Clothes I hadn’t been able to fit into comfortably for awhile were fitting again.
  • 6 months in and I’d lost around 19 pounds. I started to increase my running mileage and the weights I was lifting, I started taking the office stairs in the mornings and evenings too and it felt way easier to tell when I was actually hungry. I stopped craving more alcohol in the way I always had before.
  • 9 months in and I’d lost 22 pounds and 4 inches off my waist, ran a half marathon and had muscles I’d never seen before in my back, arms and abs. I started looking for ways to add protein to my diet to fuel my workouts and contribute to muscle growth.
  • Now, for the past 3 months I’ve been in a more relaxed ‘maintenance mode’ – keeping up with these habits (I typically work out 5-6 days a week and try to walk an average of 8-10k steps a day) but have also allowed for summer indulgences when it felt right for me.

In the immediate, my goal is to reset a bit from the past couple of summer fun months and (depending on how my body feels) get closer to that 25 pound mark. I’d love to add Pilates to my workout mix as something lower impact and fun and also run another half marathon in early Fall. And then – settle in! My initial goal was a yearlong reset but ultimately it was to create sustainable habits and a level of health that I could maintain for years to come.

When I type this all out I feel almost overwhelmingly proud. Not because I fit into a certain dress size again, but because I set my mind to something and showed up for myself week after week, for a year. Because I made myself and my future self a priority. Because even if I missed a workout or had a day where I overindulged, I started fresh the next day and didn’t let that become a string of bad days. If you had asked me in early 2023 if I would ever look/feel like this again I would have defeatedly said no. I thought being in my mid-30s meant just sort of accepting some of these changes. My last half marathon was 6 years prior and I had convinced myself I couldn’t get back to that place with running/fitness. It all just felt so far out of reach. But then I just.. started. And now? There’s no looking back.

Here’s to making your own list of non-negotiables – whether it be for your health, your finances, your career, your relationships, or all of the above. Show up for yourself and don’t listen to people that might think your goals are too big or too inconsequential. If it matters to you, it matters. I’ll see you on the running path.

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LET’S CATCH UP 7.2.24

Time is a slippery fish this year but never more so than this past month of June. Between a big promotion (me), a birthday (Adam), running a half marathon (me again), a weekend at the lake, attending the Tony Awards, 4 photoshoot days at work, and I don’t know.. I guess a little bit of sleep here and there, the month just flew by. I’m so looking forward to headed to the lake house mid-week and spending the 4th of July there as a chance to catch my breath before we dive head first into the next two months of summer. Hope you all have fun and/or relaxing plans of your own! Below, what’s on my mind, on my bookshelf and in my cart before we get away.

ON MY MIND:

  • We don’t watch a ton of TV in the summer but Season 3 of The Bear is back and I can’t wait to start it! Otherwise I might try and catch The Bikeriders in theaters – reminds me of my grandfather who was in a motorcycle club (gang?) in the 40s/50s. Picture Austin Butler but with jet black hair.
  • We’re about to hit the 1 year marker on what I’ve been lovingly calling ‘My Year of Health and Habits’ – I’ve been drafting a personal reflection post on the somewhat significant changes I’ve made and my outlook going forward. Will likely hit publish later this week.
  • I’ve never considered myself particularly good at doing my own hair but lately I’ve settled into a 3-step process that’s yielding nice results (to note: I have fine hair but a lot of it, with a slight natural wave): Step 1: use this thickening spray from John Freida; Step 2: blow dry to about 90% with this T3 hairdryer; Step 3: roll into these ceramic rollers from The Hair Edit and let sit while I do my make-up. A little hairspray, unroll and voila! The finished result is nice and smooth with some bounce/volume to it.
  • One of the goals on my Summer Bucket List was to visit 3 new restaurants and 3 new bars, I only checked off one in June! The Upper West Sides’ trendy new Bad Roman – we only had time to grab drinks at the bar before the Tony Awards but the ones we ordered were delicious and the interiors were so fun. We want to go back for dinner asap! This month we’ve got long-awaited reservations at Minetta Tavern (a NY institution that we’ve still never tried) and Adam is desperate to try Hamburger America.

ON MY BOOKSHELF:

  • I’m 4 books into my 2024 Summer Reading List – need to get a move on! I’m hoping this long weekend at the lake I can really make a dent in it and am packing Real Americans by Rachel Khong and Romantic Comedy by Curtis Sittenfeld + a few more that aren’t on the list. Whoops!
  • From the aforementioned list, all ones that I’ve read so far have been miraculously 4 stars or above for me! Highlights include The Shell Seekers by Rosamunde Pilcher – a family drama published in 1987 (a good year if I do say so myself), The Familiar by Leigh Bardugo – a historical fiction with magical realism and romance mixed in, and I’m Mostly Here to Enjoy Myself by Glynnis MacNicol – a memoir of a single woman in her late 40s reclaiming her life post-2020 with a trip to Paris. They couldn’t have been more different (which I love in my reading life) and they were each fantastic in their own right.
  • While I like think I read fairly diversely all year long, I always try to squeeze in a book by an LGBTQ author during Pride month. I picked up Old Enough by Haley Jakobson at Strand a couple of weeks ago – a YA-ish novel exploring the messiness of college relationships – and am really liking it so far. It’s a quick read and I’m guessing it will be the first one I finish at the lake.

IN MY CART:

  • So. many. sales. I try to be really mindful when I’m shopping end of season sales – sure, it’s a great price – but is it filling a gap in my wardrobe? Can I style it multiple ways with things I already own? Will I be able to wear it not just in summer but also possibly into fall as well? Luckily (or unluckily for my budget) – I’m adding plenty of things to my cart that tick all of these boxes.
  • First up – the best sale I’ve ever seen at Larroudé (I’ve been coveting their shoes for ages) – I grabbed these denim mules – I love that they’re an on trend material in a timeless silhouette. I can already think of at least 3 ways I’ll wear them now through September.
  • Next up – I wanted to grab a few new pieces to add to my workout wardrobe as I find myself constantly having to wash sports bras and shorts right now. For the price, I don’t think you can beat Old Navy activewear right now – I grabbed these cherry red shorts and matching tank bra, this navy skort and this matching high support sports bra (why are those never cute? this one is).
  • Speaking of sports, I can’t wait for the Summer Olympics in Paris. I’ll be wearing this cute USA Swimming hat in patriotic spirit.
  • I’ve been really rethinking how I want to dress at work lately. I’m a lot of people’s boss these days, and so I want to look chic and polished and ‘in charge’ so to speak – but I also want to feel like me.. fun, not too stuffy and creative/fashionable. This Ulla Johnson dress (on major sale) fits the bill really nicely. I’m going to keep watching the price – but this espresso hued leather skirt is also a knock-out.
  • In that same vein – I just picked up a chocolate brown linen midi dress and olive crinkled satin top from J.Crew that I can’t wait to wear and grabbed my beloved Weston trousers from Talbots (I own them in black and red already) in a beautiful ivory crepe – all 3 pieces on major sale right now. To note: I find the trousers run a bit large so size down if you can – I need to have mine taken in at the tailer – but then they’re perfect.
  • At the start of the year I was resolved to build a belt wardrobe and I’m starting to make a dent in it. Almost every outfit looks better to me with a nice belt. This woven leather one was perfect over the aforementioned chocolate linen dress and is on sale now for less than $50.
  • Since all of the above is shockingly practical – how swoon-worthy is this party skirt? I love the idea of it with a simple white t-shirt or crewneck sweater and then knock-out heels. Don’t threaten me with a good time.

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