Category: Life

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MY FAVORITE BOOKSTORES IN THE WORLD

Bookstores have always been one of my happiest places. My Mom worked in a library when I was a little girl and there’s something about being surrounded by books that I find deeply comforting. A tiny corner to hideaway from the world and explore one that might be completely foreign to you.

Not surprisingly, I’ve got a handful of tried and true favorite bookstores here in New York and almost always seek out bookstores when we travel (I like to buy books when I travel that remind me of that specific place – Little Women from a bookshop in New England for instance or Hemingway’s ‘A Moveable Feast’ in Paris).

I thought it might be fun to share some of my favorite shops around the world and hope that if you have a favorite that’s not on this list in your town (or someplace great that you’ve traveled) you’ll share it with me so that I can add it to my list.

  1. Strand Bookstore (Union Square, NYC) – This is my home court so to speak. For 6 of my 10 years in New York I’ve lived within walking distance to the Strand – and you can bet that if I’m within a few blocks of passing by, I’m going in. So many books on my shelf have come from here and I love that they also will buy books back in good condition – in the case that your tiny apartment no longer holds your collection. It gets packed on the weekends but I love the feeling of New Yorkers (and a good fill of tourists) all jammed in together, excited to get a new book.
  2. Shakespeare & Co (Paris, France) –  If it’s good enough for Hemingway, it’s good enough for me. That logic applies to both bars and bookstores, but in the case of Shakespeare & Co. you can get your fill of reading. The original opened in 1918 and then passed along its name to the new location, which sits along the banks of the Seine and opened in the 1950s. From F. Scott Fitzgerald to Allen Ginsberg to Zadie Smith, generations of American writers have passed through the doors of this tiny English-language bookstore in the City of Light. It’s a must visit before you browse the vintage book sellers along the river.
  3. The Spotted Dog (Hudson, NY) – Less than two hours north of Manhattan, along the quaint main street of Hudson – The Spotted Dog earns a spot on this list because it combines two of my favorite things – books and beer. A full bar with craft beer on tap sits right among the shelves. Adam and I passed an entire rainy afternoon in this sweet little spot and I can’t wait to go back again this Fall.
  4. Blue Bicycle Books (Charleston, SC) – A cute little shop right along upper King Street. There’s a lot of shopping in this stretch that feels touristy but Blue Bicycle has an authentic Southern hospitality in my opinion, with friendly staff and a great selection. Don’t miss grabbing a biscuit at Callie’s afterwards.
  5. Albertine (Upper East Side, NYC) – An extension of the French Embassy, this swoon-worthy bookstore is devoted to French & English books and sits across from Central Park on Fifth Avenue. After a stroll through the park, I suggest popping in just to see the grand ceilings alone and picking up a tres bien livre (very good book).
  6. Daunt (London, England) – This one really has my heart. A travel-focused bookshop set in London’s very posh Marylebone neighborhood, my study abroad University was just a few blocks away from this so I passed many hours between classes by popping into this shop. It’s just beautiful inside and when I finally had a chance to go back a couple of years ago, it was still as charming as ever.
  7. Brattle Bookshop (Boston, MA) – One of the oldest and largest used bookstores in America, this one fits well with Boston’s historic charm. You’ll find plenty of great affordable options plus rare first editions all just a skip away from a stroll through Boston Common.
  8. Rizzoli (Flatiron, NYC) – Another NYC favorite – I couldn’t possibly just pick one.. or two – is conveniently located in the Flatiron district and is a wealth of beautiful coffee table books, new fiction, hobby sections like cooking or photography and a cute kids section. I often pop in on my lunch break just because its so pretty inside.
  9. South Congress Books (Austin, TX) – This place has exactly the sort of quirky charm you expect in Austin’s hip South Congress neighborhood. Pick out a used or vintage book here before heading to grab tacos at nearby Guero’s.
  10. Bookmarc (West Village, NYC) – Okay, okay, one more in New York. Bookmarc is a mainstay in the West Village to me and while it’s small it has a perfectly curated, highly fashionable offering that’s always worth stopping by to see. Plus, they carry Olympia Le Tan clutches (hand-embroidered small box clutches that look like famous book covers) which I will continue to swoon over until I can one day afford.

(pictured below: The Spotted Dog and Daunt)

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ON CAREER: WHAT KEEPS YOU UP AT NIGHT

I think its safe to say that work keeps a lot of us up at night. Stress over your next career move, worry about a big project deadline.. as an adult these are the things that go bump in the night.

I’m a notoriously good sleeper. I’m asleep before Adam’s head has hit the pillow after kissing me goodnight. Give me an 8 hour flight and I’ll be asleep before we’re off the tarmac.. the stewardess gently nudging me at landing. But lately, I’ve been waking up in the middle of the night consumed with thoughts of work.

I moved into a new role at the beginning of the summer and its been stressful as I transitioned into a more managerial position. Each week, without fail, come Wednesday or so and I’d start to get restless in the night. The sounds of sirens out my window not enough to drown out the noise inside my own head. Little things that I needed to add to my to-do list or bigger picture things like budget planning for 2020. And what’s worse is that first my brain would think of work and then it would veer into new (old) territory – that time I said the wrong thing to that person 7 years ago. The perfect comeback line I should have used on that ex-boyfriend. How it would have been best to stop at three tequila shots that time at that bar. You get the idea. It seems my transition at work was strangely digging up my entire past.

Joan Didion once said “I think we are well advised to keep on nodding terms with the people we used to be, whether we find them attractive company or not. Otherwise they turn up unannounced and surprise us, come hammering on the mind’s door at 4AM of a bad night and demand to know who deserted them, who betrayed them, who is going to make amends.” This summer has been the first time I truly understood her.

But then last week – something changed. I launched a project at work and was really happy with the results, then came home and had spent the evening feeling very excited about a side project I’ve been working on, thinking about how it perfectly combines some of my passions and will be a great creative outlet besides my full time career. That night I predictably woke in the dark, but this time – my mind was bright with ideas. I was back asleep before I knew it. I’ve been sleeping soundly ever since.

It turns out – you may need to shake your mind awake so that you can sleep. There’s always going to be things to be stressed about (career-wise or life-wise), but for me at least – once I managed to flip the script and think of all the possibilities of the future, the missteps of the past started to quiet down in my head. Here’s to a solid eight hours.

SHOP THE STORY:

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ON MONEY: HOW TO CHANGE YOUR MONEY MINDSET

I was floored by the fact that so many of you responded with a resounding ‘yes!’ to my prompt about financial posts here on the blog. In general, I find the conversation among young women about money terribly lacking. Couple that with the fact that most of us were raised not to discuss money and never taught anything about the practical side of things like bills, student loan debt and retirement savings in school (why is this not a required class??) – and I think it deserves at least a blog post or two. 

To begin – I’m clearly not an expert on any of this. But I think that’s a good thing. It’s intimidating to read advice from financial experts – but from a woman who is working hard to pay off her credit cards and find more ways to save money plus plan for the future? That seems easier to swallow. I’ve made money mistakes too, so you’re not on your own.

I’ve got a lot of ideas for posts surrounding this topic – but to start, I wanted to share how I changed my money mindset at the beginning of the year. To make a long story short – I spent a lot of years pretty broke. A combination of student loan debt, high cost of living in New York and entry level wages. Then a cross-country move to LA.. then a cross-country move to get back home to New York. It all took its toll. And even years after I was not necessarily broke, I was kind of just getting by. There never felt like there was enough to substantially save let alone plan for my long-term future. And somewhere around January 1st of this year I kind of just snapped. I couldn’t take one more day/week/month/year of letting my finances control me. I wanted complete control. I wanted to feel the freedom of knowing I was financially secure.

That tipping point will likely be sparked by different things for different people. Maybe you just got a big raise and finally want to spend it smartly. Maybe you found out you’re pregnant and are freaking out about how you are going to afford it. Regardless, I think when you’re really truly ready to make a change to your money mindset – you’ll know it. From there, think long and hard about your goals. Do you want to retire early? Travel the world now? There’s no wrong answer, but you’ll want a clear set of goals in order for these changes to really stick.

To begin – you need to get a really firm grasp on every single dollar in your life. I made spreadsheets that laid out every dollar I earn, every dollar that goes to a fixed cost and every extra dollar. Then all of those got further broken down into categories. You’ll start to see patterns.. do you have 15 subscriptions you never use? There’s $150 a month out the window. Do you buy your lunch instead of planning ahead and packing. Boom, there’s $50+ a week back in your pocket. Decide what you feel like you can’t live without and what you can, cut the fat, wait a day and then look again. Repeat the process.

Once you see your money staring back at you it’s a lot easier to make decisions about it. There are great apps for this (Minted and Every Dollar are both good), but a simple google sheet will do the job too. When I started and needed the most radical help, I found apps a little bit passive – but when I actually had to type out that I paid $14 for a salad.. it held me more accountable and kept inspiring me to make changes in order to create a spreadsheet that I would feel proud to look at every week. And instead of vaguely thinking at the end of each month – I wish I could have saved more, I started considering my debt payments and the savings fixed costs. Like rent, they became non-negotiable.

Once I felt like I had a real handle on what was possible in a given month, I made a one year plan. Plus a five year, ten year and twenty year financial plan. Obviously there are things that could radically change over that period of time, but if I think in 10 years I want to own a getaway home outside the city or in 20 years I want to have a college savings fund for a couple of kids.. I need to be thinking about that now.

So the plans were set. Now how did I stick to it? I made it a habit. Habits are easier than self control. It doesn’t take a lot of will power to brush your teeth every morning (it’s a habit), so I wanted to get to the point where managing my money properly felt the same way.

And when I was tempted by a cute new pair of shoes or a dress on sale? I consulted the spreadsheet. Like literally would stand in a store and pull up the spreadsheet on my phone. Sometimes just that simple act was enough to remind me that I had bigger goals and I’d easily be able to walk out the door. But just in case – I unsubscribed from store emails too and started walking home a different way so I no longer passed by some of my favorite Fifth Avenue shops. And if I still wanted that dress? I wrote it down on a list of “wants”. Everything from a new couch to those cute shoes would go on the list and then as I looked at my weekly discretionary money I could consult the list and decide what I really wanted most and what I could stand waiting on.

In short, I made a lot of lists. 8 months later though? And I’ve never felt more free. Sometimes Adam and I just look at the number in our savings account and are dumbfounded at how we saved so much so far this year (listen it’s not like we’re running away to the South of France anytime soon – but it’s more than we’ve ever had in that account before). And it’s because I made it a habit for us. I drew a firm line in the sand and refused to step back over it. Every single day I think about my money for at least a few minutes. I check in, I remind myself why I started and I plan for tomorrow.

If it sounds overwhelming, I promise you the feeling of living paycheck to paycheck is more overwhelming. We devote time every day to our mental and physical health, surely we can give 5 minutes a day to financial health, no?

Next time I’m going to tackle my strategy for fall shopping (in keeping with my new money mindset) and I’ve got posts planned for how I deal with living in a veryyy expensive city, decorating a home on a budget and how I balance money in my relationship with Adam. Lots more to come! Happy saving my friends.

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LET’S CATCH UP 8.4.19

As we sit at the beginning of August, still in the thick of hot summer days but with the realization that they’re passing all too quickly, I figured it was a good time to hit pause and catch up. Below, a few things on my mind before we head into what will no doubt be another whirlwind week.

  1. This past week (amidst a difficult work week) I started making lists on my phones of random things that made me happy each day. It really shifts your perspective. This week here are a few things that landed on my list: Saw two old men who seemed like old friends unexpectedly run into one another in the park, saw a very little girl hug a very big fluffy dog, a big bunch of limelight hydrangeas bloomed along my walk to work, Adam made me laugh until I was in tears, I tried a new workout… the list goes on. This post mirrors my sentiment.
  2. Adam and I set a goal to be “finished” with decorating the apartment by October. Not that it still won’t evolve as we live here but we have a few things that we want to push ourselves to wrap up so we can finally start entertaining this fall. This rug is at the top of our wishlist for the living room and we’re thinking of popping up to Brimfield in September to find a few more vintage finishing touches.
  3. Speaking of homes – this house tour is like a Wes Anderson movie come to life. That incredible kids room is exactly what I’d do if the lake house were mine alone to decorate (it’s doubtful that Adam’s family would agree to this – ha!). Life is too short to not have fun with decorating.
  4. We’re almost done season 2 of Big Little Lies (HBO) and Ozark (on Netflix) – both are so suspenseful! What should we watch next? I could go for some comic relief.
  5. August always signals “back to school” shopping for me and as a kid that meant a new pair of jeans. My friends at Talbots just sent over this pair of girlfriend jeans and they’re the perfect relaxed fit in a timeless dark wash. I’ll be wearing them everywhere come September.
  6. Our tiny local park (we call it our backyard) plays free outdoor movies in the summer and this week we’re going to see Wall-E. The animated pixar movie first came out in 2008 and was set in the “future” and shows all of these humans who only communicate through tiny screens fixed in front of their faces, even to speak to someone right next to them, and have had to leave their planet because it’s overrun with trash. I think it will be incredibly poignant to watch it now that we’re firmly in said “future”.
  7. Speaking of things that should be cautionary, fictional tales, but are frighteningly our reality – the gun problem in this country has reached an absolute fever pitch and I don’t know how we’re still not agreeing on this. It’s not a partisan issue when people are afraid to go to the movies, send their kids to school or do their weekly shopping for fear of being gunned down in a mass shooting. Here’s a great site with 30 ways to take action.

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THE STEELE MAIDEN BOOK CLUB: CHAPTER TEN

I’ve been reading so many books this summer that I nearly forgot to go back and write the reviews on this batch! I have long days at the lake house/in the park to thank for that (plus stress at work that leads me to want to escape into a good book to blame for it). Last time I checked in, I committed to 5 books and I breezed right through them all and for the most part really love each one! Below my reviews + what I’ve already moved on to next on my shelf. And you can find all of my book club posts here.

SHOP THIS MONTH”S BOOK CLUB:

Black Swans by Eve Babitz: What an unexpected treat. This collection of short storeis reads a bit like Joan Didion meets Carrie Bradshaw if she were a 1960s Hollywood groupie. There were times I would write her off completely as a vapid valley girl and in the next sentence she would write something so beautiful I’d be searching for my notebook to copy it down. The stories are about the city of Los Angeles and her wild times… and sober days… living there. I loved this and it set me up nicely to get into the 1970’s LA rock ‘n roll scene that led right into reading Daisy Jones. (4 out of 5 stars)

Normal People by Sally Rooney: I expected to love this based on the rave reviews I was seeing everywhere – and I did like it… but I haven’t found myself highly recommending it to anyone. The novel follows a long up and down relationship between a young girl and guy as they struggle to define themselves both separately and together. While the portrayals of the main characters were honest and in depth, there was something slightly forgettable about the entire storyline – just teetering on the edge of being fully engrossing to me. (3.5 out of 5 stars)

Daisy Jones & The Six by Taylor Jenkins-Reid: This book on the other hand was exactly as fun as I hoped that it would be – I honestly may read it again this summer (it only took me a day and a half I was so into it!). Written in a really interesting documentary style of interviews, the novel follows a band that rose to quick fame in the 70s and then broke up. Very ‘Almost Famous’ – a movie I love deeply, so consider that a major compliment. (5 out of 5 stars)

Blue Nights by Joan Didion: Ohhh Joan. Her book ‘The Year of Magical Thinking‘ about her husband’s death and daughter’s illness is in my top 10 favorite books of all time. ‘Blue Nights’ didn’t knock that out of place, but I really loved it too. This one is about her daughter’s death and once again Joan’s incredible ability to cut through the heart of one of life’s most trying experiences and really examine her own closest relationships is so moving. (5 out of 5 stars)

Goodbye, Vitamin: Funny and heartfelt this was a quick read that I ended up loving after picking up on a whim at the library. This novel follows the story of a woman in her early 30s who moves back home for a year when her father is diagnosed with dementia. Sometimes when things get the hardest in a family, it’s exactly when you need to find the humor most – and this book does that to great effect. (4.5 out of 5 stars)

SHOP NEXT MONTH’S BOOK CLUB:

I’m going to be closing out the summer reading as much as I can. My stack this month includes Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine by Gail Honeyman, Gingerbread by Helen Oyeyemi, My Year of Rest and Relaxation by Ottessa Moshfegh (all buzzy, relatively new fiction), Three Women by Lisa Taddeo (non-fiction following the true love lives of three American women – in vastly different scenarios – I’ve heard SO many rave reviews of this) and Leading Men by Christopher Castellani (which just seems like a fun, summer read). Happy reading!